Austria: Syrian Migrant Caught 'Masturbating Next to Children's Playground'

Chris Menahan
InformationLiberation
Jul. 29, 2016

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"Our diversity is our strength!"

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From the Daily Star:

A SYRIAN man was caught masturbating next to a children’s playground on Monday afternoon.

Parents had notified the police after they spotted the 25-year-old in the courtyard of a street in Austrian capital Vienna’s Favoriten district.

According to police spokesman Thomas Keiblinger, the Syrian national was watching the children in the playground while he was masturbating.

They're here to help.

When he saw the parents of the children calling the police, he fled the scene.

The police eventually managed to apprehend the unnamed Syrian man because the parents were able to give a detailed and thorough description.

They then identified him a short while later and he was arrested.

It is currently unclear whether he has been charged.

Rumor has it Angela Merkel immediately called for this man to be given asylum in Germany in the name of "cultural enrichment."

"I have no doubt he will help pay for our elderly's pensions," Merkel said.

(That's a joke.)

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