Keep the Guns; Abolish the Police

by William Grigg
Jul. 30, 2012

On July 23 New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg, one of the most implacably totalitarian figures in American political history, suggested that police nationwide should go on strike until the law-abiding public disarms itself.

"I don't understand why the police officers in this country don't stand up collectively and say, `we're going to go on strike," Bloomberg blurted in an interview with CNN's Piers Morgan. "We're not going to protect you unless you -- the public -- through your legislature do what's required to keep us safe. After all, police officers want to go home to their families."

Bloomberg sheepishly revised his comments a few days later -- but not before an unidentified cop in Portland, Oregon acted on his suggestion, thereby offering a splendid illustration of the fact that given our choice, we should keep our guns and abolish the police

Rob Anderson, who owns a computer software store, sauntered over to nearby Central Drugs to buy some aspirin.

"I didn't notice anything until the pharmacist behind the counter yelled for us to `Get out of here! We're closed!" Anderson told the Oregonian. "I thought that was kind of weird."

A few minutes earlier, a robber -- later identified as Jocelin Olson -- had entered the store with his hand concealed in a pocket.

"I have a gun!" he bellowed, demanding money and various drugs. He fled with a bag of prescription drugs.

By this time Anderson -- who saw enough to recognize that a robbery was underway -- had spied a uniformed officer in a marked police car. Anderson told this valiant defender of the public weal that a robbery was in progress a block away. The heroic paladin of public order replied that he was off duty and told Anderson to call 911. He then rolled up his window and drove away.

"We all expect a little better from the police in this situation," Anderson later recalled, expressing entirely appropriate disgust -- and entirely unwarranted confidence in the character and competence of government law enforcement officers.

While the officer, in compliance with the Prime Directive of law enforcement, "officer safety," was making himself scarce, two employees of the drugstore -- one of whom had obtained his personal firearm -- gave chase to the bandit, eventually tracking him down and arresting him without the aid of the exalted personages in government-issued official attire. One of them restrained the suspect (who had only feigned carrying a gun) in a half-nelson hold until the police tardily arrived.

The Portland police officer who fled the scene rather than tangle with an (apparently) armed robber would most likely have been as bold as Hector if he had been dealing with an unarmed 12-year-old girl, or a skinny, unarmed, mentally handicapped street person. Officer Chris Humphreys shot the former at point-blank range with a beanbag round, and -- with the help of three associates -- chased down and beat to death the latter, a 145-pound schizophrenic named James Chasse. On another occasion, Humphreys beat a helpless man 30 times with a baton before discovering that the victim wasn't the suspect he was pursuing.

After Humphreys was placed on paid vacation after shooting the 12-year-old girl, Sgt. Scott Westermann, commissar of the local police union, insisted that he "exemplified everything one could imagine a police officer should be." Humphreys and another officer were given two-week suspensions for the killing of James Chasse -- a trivial "punishment" which was reversed by an arbitrator exactly two weeks before one of their comrades helpfully displayed the utter uselessness of the agency that employs them.

Upset over public criticism of his tax-funded criminal career, Humphreys filed for "stress disability," and his brethren in the police union -- insisting that he had "suffered enough" -- held a rally at City Hall wearing custom t-shirts bearing the unwittingly incriminating inscription: "We Are All Chris Humphreys."

No truer sentiment was ever embossed on a t-shirt.

Memo to Mayor Bloomberg: We'd be better off with an armed citizenry and no police.